Ode to the mystery Litter Louts- add verses as you think fit!

Ode to the mystery Litter Louts- add verses as you think fit!

8th of March, 2021

Please read the list of items lower down which are spoiling our lovely village - are YOU a culprit??

This Ode was penned following a short recent walk & litter pick, just around the top of Abbott Brow, then along Mellor Lane to Methodist Church

 What goes on in your mind, oh do tell us please
When you're hanging those poo bags in hedges and trees
You must love your dog, (and it's good that you do)
If you think that we want plastic bags of its poo

What neurons ignite, what synapsis flash
When you think that our fields are a home for your trash
You discard your crisp packets, empty bottles and cans
With never a thought once they're out of your hands

Your bottles, your wrappers, your plastic and tin
You're using our village like a big litter bin
If you’re thinking at all it’s just of yourselves
(Do you think all your litter is picked up by elves?)

I don't care what you're like when you're watching TV
If you're knee deep in rubbish doesn't matter to me
But stop being selfish when you're out and about
Stop spoiling our village you unknown litter louts.

Now for the list - and consider if any of this might be yours!

5 plastic bags of dog dirt (blame the owners not the dogs)
A nappy !! (obviously somebody takes the word “disposable” a little too literally)
3 nitrous oxide capsules (possibly youngsters)
A full tray load of Macdonalds wrappers (presumably adults throwing from cars as the nearest Macdonalds is not walking distance)
Costa coffee cups and several lids
An empty bottle of cheap vodka 

Enough plastic water bottles to float a small ship

Several face masks - presumably removed so the owner could drink the cheap vodka or lager

Shards of broken plastic sledges (ideal for being swallowed by a sheep or cattle)
At least a dozen cans of lager and cider

Do we all want Mellor to become a permanent rubbish tip, or do we care enough to take our litter home to dispose of it properly, and to ask others to do the same?